“I want to live so that I am truly submitted
to the Spirit’s leading on a daily basis. Christ said it is better for us that
the spirit came, and I want to live like I know that is true. I don’t want to
keep crawling when I have the ability to fly.” –Francis Chan, Forgotten God
I made a Christmas tree out of green
construction paper, complete with a paper star, and lights. I thought this is
the best I am going to get in my first African Christmas. However, Corrinne and
I went to a friend’s house, and they let me have a tree to take home.
If everyone didn’t already think I
was crazy when I made the paper tree, I know they do now. The look on their faces when I brought the
tree home was priceless. I could clearly see what they were thinking; it was written
all over their faces, “What the heck is this crazy white girl doing? She cut
down a perfectly good tree, brings it in the house, and puts it in water.” I
explained it was an American Christmas tree, and they all nodded and smiled,
and helped me bring it in, all the while wondering about my mental state. Earlier in the week, before I knew we would
get a real tree, we made Christmas ornaments. The kids each drew a picture on a
piece of paper with their name and we taped it to the paper tree. We also made
snowflakes, which the kids were very excited to do. Heck, I was excited. There
is nothing like making random cuts on a folded piece of paper, and then opening
it to find a unique design.
The next day I made paper streamers
(red and green) and began decorating the tree while the kids were at school. I
took all of their ornaments off the paper tree and put a string through to hang
on the real tree. I also made some candy canes to hang and an angel for the
top. Our African –American Christmas
tree was complete. Now to wait for the approval of my Tanzanian family.
When the kids got home and came into
the house they just paused in awe. Nobody said anything for a while, they just
came over and carefully examined the tree; each kid seeking out their ornament.
They smiled at me with twinkles in their eyes, and said, “This, very good
Christmas tree.” It is quite possibly the worst Christmas tree that I have ever
seen; it’s dying already, all the ornaments are paper, its branches are all
lopsided and smashed from being in the truck, and yet it is the best Christmas
tree that I have ever seen. It’s my new families first, and knowing that they
love it, means the world to me. Whenever we have people over they laugh, and
comment on our tree, but I know that they all love it. They love the crazy
white girls African-American Christmas tree. Our perfectly imperfect tree.
This week has been full or
frustrations. My first week alone, so of course I am faced with things, like
management, and discipline. Trying to decide how we will do the shamba, (little
money, lots of work to be done) to one of the kids keeps running off and not
telling anyone where he is going. Things that I have no experience dealing
with, and yet here I am, still learning and now it’s time to take it all on.
I am trying to breathe, and love, and
learn, and grow, and hope that the decisions I am making are the best I can
make. I feel so brand new (because I am, one month and counting) and now I have
people checking in with me, asking my permission for things, wondering if we
can change the menu this week, the kukus (chickens) are now laying 8 eggs a day
so can we stop buying them, the kids are on break so what do we do with them
all day. All things that to be quite honest I have no idea about and yet now I have
to decide what needs to be done, how to delegate tasks, and who goes where
when. God is reminding me, in a gentle way, that I need him. I am here because
this is where he wants me, lean on him, share with him in my joy and struggles,
have faith that he will show me the way.
This week I made dinner for 15
people. We had spaghetti, with sauce that I made from scratch, and cheesy
breadsticks, also made from scratch. Not to totally brag or anything, but it
was amazing. I felt like a real mom, or something. I am making breakfast for
the kids 4 times a week, but this had some time and effort put into it. I am
also learning to master the oven. You see we have a stove where you have a
fire, and so there is no temperature gage to tell you that you are now at 425
degrees so you have to pay attention. Also the first batch might cook for 10
minutes, but the next batch only needs 5 minutes.
It’s kind of like driving here. You
have to keep your eyes on the road at all times, because right now the path may
be smooth, but in a minute you have to avoid holes, and dips, and chickens, or
people. It forces you to be an even better driver than in the states. I mean
honestly, in the states you know that the road is going to be smooth, you know
that there is room for another person to pass, you know that the chances of
chickens crossing the road are slim, so you can relax, and enjoy the ride. I
was thinking about what I miss most from America, and besides the obvious
(friends, family, pets) I miss paved roads! Never ending smooth roads, and
driving on the left side of the car and road. I had a dream last night that
when I got home from Tanzanian, my parents had bought me a car with the
steering wheel on the right side, I was not happy. (Mom and dad, don’t buy me a
car like that please, love you!)
I am learning lots of things about
the culture here from my new Tanzanian friends. I learned that there is a thing
called a bride price, which means when a man wants to marry a woman; he must go
to her father and ask how much. The father will then give a price and the man
must pay whatever the father says. (The bride, getting none of the money) So I have
been informed that for a mzungu woman (white woman) the price will be much
higher. My dad could be making some serious money over here, selling me to the
highest bidder and all. I told some of my Tanzanian friends that my parents will
be coming in May(ish) and they can speak with him then. LOL. Maybe my parents
could get their trip paid for by selling me to a Tanzanian husband.
Even with all of the frustrations, I
am happy. I have started jogging in the mornings, and it’s so peaceful. I am
not a jogger but apparently the thing to do when you come to Tanzania is become
one. (For the Americans) Tanzanians think we are strange for jogging around for
no apparent reason, but they smile and wave as I pass. My dad asked if I was
out running lions. I told him I need the practice, safety first!
I thought that when I came to
Tanzania I would become more mature, and grown up, and yet I have never acted
more like a child, and I love it. Dance parties, are now a daily ritual,
coloring, playing games, spinning in circles till you fall down, and laughing
daily all make up my life in Tanzania, and I hope it never ends.
Thank you all for your continued
prayers and support.
Love the latest update. Do you have pictures of your "real" tree? God is with you and you will do fine being in charge! Love all that you are experiencing.
ReplyDeleteI love reading your updates! You are having such an amazing experience there.
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